I have decided to stop being so negative and cynical about everything. It is therapeutic to force oneself to have happy and positive thoughts. Accordingly, I decided to make a list of all of the good things that will come out of the Obama administration and the Democrat controlled Congress. Are you ready?
Here we go:
Alright, well…..this is going to be harder than I thought.
The potheads are smoggin it out up in Massachusetts right now. They voted to decriminalize weed for possession under 1 ounce. Funny thing is that most of the potheads are saying that weed is now “legal” in Massachusetts. Not so fast Cheech. Possessing any weed at all is still a ticket with a $100 fine. Oh yeah, the Pigs still confiscate your stash. Sorry to kill your buzz dudes. Maybe if you weren’t so stoned you wouldn’t have thought the new law meant it was legal in the first place.
Yesterday morning, I gassed up my SUV with 21 gallons at $2.09 per gallon! Saweeet! You could hear that 5.3 L – V8 just sucking the gas under that hood when I put my foot in the floor! Man…oh man. OPEC is just beside themselves. $60 per barrel!! Remember when light crude was on the way to $200 a barrel and our good friends in Saudi Arabia did not see a need to increase output? Now it is $60 a barrel and they are cutting output to no avail. Man, are these guys going to be in trouble if we ever figure out a way to be energy independent. Never mind that if a bunch of American companies formed a pact to control the output of anything they would go to jail for price fixing.
Apparently, there were reports of violence in Los Angeles and San Francisco during Gay protests to the passage of Proposition 8 (ban on gay marriage). Nope, it didn’t come from homophobe counter demonstrations or Bible thumpers. It was the gays themselves. Man, and to think a lot of folks were worried about racial tension when the election results were evident. As it turns out, not much racial tension……but is this what you would call “sexual tension?” It looks like we are in for a bunch more parades.
Last month, the board of the Golden Gate Bridge, Highway and Transportation District voted 14-1 to construct suicide nets around the famous bridge for a cost of $50 million. Apparently, 19 jumpers have ended their life so far this year off of the span. According to my calculations, that is an average of 2.11 jumpers per month. At a construction cost of $50 million, that’s just under $2 million per jumper in the first year. I have always struggled with the morality of placing a dollar amount on a human life, but insurance companies do it. I am thinking a john boat and a big fishing gaff would be much more cost efficient.
Here is a guy that destroyed his home while trying to clean out the cobwebs with a blowtorch. Apparently, he was not harmed. Looks like natural selection did not win out this time.
Our friend Cherish sent the following photo and some of the commentary. Thanks Cherish!
The photo below captures a disturbing trend that is beginning to affect wildlife in the US . Since the Obama victory, animals that were formerly self-sufficient are now showing signs of belonging to the Democratic Party... as they have apparently learned to just sit and wait for the government to step in and provide for their care and sustenance.
This photo is of a Democrat black bear in Montana nicknamed 'Bearack', who has a seat front and center at the table of wealth redistribution. I never knew a liberal could be so cute. Of course, just wait and see how long he stays this cute if his redistributed wealth doesn’t show up. Is that a FEMA trailer in the background?
That’s all for now folks. See, it wasn’t that bad was it? I feel happier already.